With the Superbowl coming up, now is the chance to make a prediction. This year the predictions should be extremely easy. As you may or may not know it is going to be the Philidelphia Eagles versus the New England Patriots. Now if we take a look at their past track records we can clearly see that the Eagles completely suck in the post season by usually dying in the first round, where as the Patriots have won the Superbowl 4 out of the past 5 years. This year the Superbowl seems like it is a given that the Patriots will win, however the Patriots never seem to completely destroy teams. They usually keep the scores pretty close. My final prediction is that the Patriots will beat the Eagles by a touchdown.
Month: January 2005
President Bush’s Inaugural Speech Summary
This document will cover the key points of the 2005 presidential inaugural speech that was given by George W. Bush in January 2005. Within the Presidential speech you may or may not have heard key points that were a bit confusing. This document will try to mitigate any confusion by spelling it out in plain English.’, ‘The first key point the President made was about the success of liberty in America depends on the success of liberty in foreign lands. By saying this President Bush was simply stating that anybody who opposes our way of life would have to contend with the stern hand of America. Anybody who is willing to accept democracy the United States will be there to support them in becoming a free nation. The second key point that was being made was about human rights. The point being made was that if you accept our views on human rights you will see the US is more than just, however if you want to defy the US’s views on human rights and you will see how much of a burden you will be bringing on yourself. The President identifies what he believes are clear examples of immoral acts of human rights. He tried to identify how human rights would never be upheld without liberty and by stating the message is not only being sent out to rulers of other nations, but to the followers of the rulers. It takes everybody to make these sets of ideals to be upheld. Another key point I believe the President was trying to make was that the US has taken on great responsibilities by taking the lead as a nation to step up and do what other countries weren’t willing to do and for the US to keep doing this there needs to be sacrifices made for one’s country.
In conclusion, the President’s speech was directed at focusing on the ideals he believes Americans are most concerned with and ultimately will unite everyone with one common bond.
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C-130 Pilot’s Story
“There I was at six thousand feet over central Iraq, two hundred eighty knots and we”re dropping faster than Paris Hilton”s panties. It”s a typical September evening in the Persian Gulf; hotter than a rectal thermometer and I”m sweating like a priest at a Cub Scout meeting. But that”s neither here nor there. The night is moonless over Baghdad tonight, and blacker than a Steven King novel. But it”s 2004, folks, and I”m sporting the latest in night-combat technology – namely, hand-me-down night vision goggles (NVGs) thrown out by the fighter boys.”‘, ‘”Additionally, my 1962 Lockheed C-130E Hercules is equipped with an obsolete, yet, semi-effective missile warning system (MWS). The MWS conveniently makes a nice soothing tone in your headset just before the missile explodes into your airplane. Who says you can”t polish a turd?”
“At any rate, the NVGs are illuminating Baghdad International Airport like the Las Vegas Strip during a Mike Tyson fight. These NVGs are the cat”s ass. But I”ve digressed.”
“The preferred method of approach tonight is the random shallow. This tactical maneuver allows the pilot to ingress the landing zone in an unpredictable manner, thus exploiting the supposedly secured perimeter of the airfield in an attempt to avoid enemy surface-to-air-missiles and small
arms fire. Personally, I wouldn”t bet my pink ass on that theory but the approach is fun as hell and that”s the real reason we fly it.”
“We get a visual on the runway at three miles out, drop down to one thousand feet above the ground, still maintaining two hundred eighty knots. Now the fun starts. It”s pilot appreciation time as I descend the mighty Herk to six hundred feet and smoothly, yet very deliberately, yank into a sixty degree left bank, turning the aircraft ninety degrees offset from runway heading. As soon as we roll out of the turn, I reverse turn to the right a full two hundred seventy degrees in order to roll out aligned with the runway. Some aeronautical genius coined this maneuver the “Ninety/Two-Seventy.” Chopping the power during the turn, I pull back on the yoke just to the point my nether regions start to sag, bleeding off energy in order to configure the pig for landing.”
“Flaps Fifty!, Landing Gear Down!, Before Landing Checklist!” I look over at the copilot and he”s shaking like a cat shitting on a sheet of ice. Looking further back at the navigator, and even through the NVGs, I can clearly see the wet spot spreading around his crotch. Finally, I glance at
my steely-eyed flight engineer. His eyebrows rise in unison as a grin forms on his face. I can tell he”s thinking the same thing I am…. “Where do we find such fine young men?”
“Flaps One Hundred!” I bark at the shaking cat. Now it”s all aimpoint and airspeed. Aviation 101, with the exception there are no lights, I”m on NVGs, it”s Baghdad, and now tracers are starting to crisscross the black sky. Naturally, and not at all surprisingly, I grease the Goodyear”s on brick-one of runway 33 left, bring the throttles to ground idle and then force the props to full reverse pitch. Tonight, the sound of freedom is my four Hamilton Standard propellers chewing through the thick, putrid, Baghdad air. The huge, one hundred thirty thousand pound, lumbering whisper
pig comes to a lurching stop in less than two thousand feet. Let”s see a Viper do that!”
“We exit the runway to a welcoming committee of government issued Army grunts. It”s time to download thir beans and bullets and letters from their sweethearts, look for war booty, and of course, urinate on Saddam”s home. Walking down the crew entry steps with my lowest-bidder, Beretta 92F, 9 millimeter strapped smartly to my side, I look around and thank God, not Allah, I”m an American and I”m on the winning team. Then I thank God I”m not in the Army. Knowing once again I”ve cheated death, I ask myself, “What in the hell am I doing in this mess?” Is it Duty, Honor, and Country? You bet your ass. Or could it possibly be for the glory, the swag, and not to mention, chicks dig the Air Medal? There”s probably some truth there too. But now is not the time to derive the complexities of the superior, cerebral properties of the human portion of the aviator-man-machine model. It is however, time to get out of this shit-hole. “Hey copilot, clean yourself up! And how”s ”bout the ”Before Starting Engines Checklist.””
“God, I love this job!!”
[US/60]
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Confession
Jake was dying. His wife, Becky, was maintaining a vigil by his side. She held his fragile hand in the weak light, tears running down her face. Her praying woke him from his slumber. He looked up, pale lips moving slightly.
“Becky my darling,” he whispered.
“Hush my love,” she said. “Rest, don”t talk.”
He was insistent. “Becky,” he said in his tired voice, “I have something that I must confess.”
“There”s nothing to confess,” replied the weeping Becky, “everything”s all right, go to sleep now.”
“No, no. I must die in peace, Becky. I…I slept with your sister, your best friend, her best friend and your mother.” “I know sweet one” whispered Becky, “let the poison work.