Tag: paint

Those Sneaky Marines

Look closely … Keep looking! See it now? You have got to love the Marines.

The New 2012 Ford

Renault and Ford have joined forces to create the perfect small car for women. Mixing the Renault ‘Clio’ and the Ford ‘Taurus’ they have designed the ‘Clitaurus’. It comes in pink, and the average male car thief won’t be able to find it – let alone turn it on – even if someone tells him …

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Chili Cook-off Compliments

**Note: Please take time to read this slowly. If you pay attention to the first two judges, the reaction of the third judge is even better! For those of you who have lived in Texas, you know how true this is. They actually have a Chili Cook-off about the time the Rodeo comes to town. …

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How to Get Permission to Play Golf

During the 4th hole the following conversations took place: First Guy : You have no idea what I had to do to be able to come out golfing this weekend… I had to promise my wife that I will paint every room in the house next weekend. Second Guy : That’s nothing; I had to …

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Hot Chili

I went to Home Depot recently while not being altogether sure that course of action was a wise one. You see, the previous evening I had prepared and consumed a massive quantity of my patented ‘you’re definitely going to s**t yourself’ road-kill chilli. Tasty stuff, albeit hot to the point of being painful, which comes …

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Lil’ ole lady

A farmer stopped by the local mechanic shop to have his truck fixed. They couldn’t do it while he waited, so he said he didn’t live far and would just walk home. On the way home he stopped at the hardware store and bought a bucket and a gallon of paint. He then stopped by …

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Awesome Helicopter Paint Job

This very special Mi-24 helicopter is presently flying in Afghanistan, where it is no doubt causing quite a stir.

Questions & Answers

Q: What’s a mixed feeling?A: When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car. Q: What’s the height of conceit?A: Having an orgasm and calling out your own name. Q: What’s the definition of macho?A: Jogging home from your vasectomy. Q: What’s the difference between a G-Spot and a golf ball?A: …

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