Tag: Florida

Love at 81

Maude and Claude, both 81, lived in The Villages, in Florida. They met at the singles club meeting and discovered over time that they enjoyed each others’ company. After several weeks of meeting for coffee, Claude asked Maude out for dinner and, much to his delight, she accepted. They had a lovely evening. They dined …

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The Amazing WD-40

I had a neighbor who bought a new pickup. I got up very early one Sunday morning and saw that someone had spray painted red all around the sides of this beige truck (for some unknown reason). I went over, woke him up, and told him the bad news. He was very upset and was …

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Florida or Moon

Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking, and one blonde says to the other, ‘Which do you think is farther away… Florida or the moon?’ The other blonde turns and says ‘Helloooooooooo, can you see Florida?

Smart Ass

Two young businessmen in Florida were sitting down for a break in their soon-to-be new store in the shopping mall. As yet, the store wasn’t ready, with only a few shelves and display racks set up. One said to the other, “I’ll bet that any minute now some old person is going to walk by, …

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2011 Football Scouting Report

Wayfron P. Jackson: 6′ 6″, 215 lbs. Wide Receiver. Hottest prospect from Texas in the last ten years. Loves rap music. Will demand a mini-cassette in his helmet. Currently holds world record for the most “you knows” during an interview (62 in one minute). Wayfron can print his complete name. Signed with Tennessee. Quinticious Jenkins: …

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Humor – Five Surgeons

Five surgeons having drinks together at a surgical convention exchanged opinions regarding their favorite patient types. The first, a Florida surgeon, said, “I like to see accountants on my operating table, because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered.” The second, a Michigan surgeon, responded, “Yeah, but you should try electricians. Everything inside …

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What is the main ingredient of WD-40?

Before you read to the end, does anybody know what the main ingredient of WD-40 is? Don’t lie and don’t cheat. WD-40. Who knew; I had a neighbor who bought a new pickup. I got up very early one Sunday morning and saw that someone had spray painted red all around the sides of this …

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Blonde Logic

Blonde Logic Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking, and one blonde says to the other, “Which do you think is farther away… Florida or the moon?” The other blonde turns and says “Helloooooo oooo, can you see Florida?” Car Trouble A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She …

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2008 Capitol One Bowl: Michigan 41 – Florida 35

The 2007 NCAA football season had many ups and downs for the University of Michigan. Starting out the season being unprepared for Appalachian State and then turning around and getting spanked by Oregon at home definitely was not the way any team would want to start out their year. Following those two games the University …

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Mexican Boarder Wall Problem Solved

Dig a moat the length of the Mexican border, take the dirt and raise the levies in New Orleans, and then put the Florida alligators into the border moat! Any other problems you would like for me to solve?

Bond Set for Michael Moffatt Charged With Shooting Wife

(photo courtesy of The Kumachan) Michael Clinton Moffatt, charged at the beginning of the month with attempted murder, has been trying since then to get a judge to set bail, but until Tuesday had no luck. Following a hearing before Mobile County Circuit Judge Charles Graddick, a bail of $250,000 was ordered for the 15-year …

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Does a Certain Song Bring Back That Certain Memory?

The other day I heard the song by Cher – Believe. Normally I wouldn’t really pay attention to a bad knockoff of techno like this, except it made me start thinking of the first place I heard it. The first time I heard this song was in Florida. I remember it vividly because I was …

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