Somewhere in Canada – way up North! We received about 20 inches of snow this week. So……….
8:00 A.M.: I made a snowman.
8:10 – A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn’t make a snow woman.
8:15 – So, I made a snow woman.
8:17 – My feminist neighbour complained about the snow woman’s voluptuous chest saying it objectified women everywhere.
8:20 – The gay couple living nearby threw a hissy fit and moaned it should have been two snowmen instead.
8:22 – The transgender man / woman / person asked why I didn’t just make one snow person with detachable parts.
8:25 – The vegans at the end of the lane complained about the carrot nose, as veggies are food and are not to be used to decorate snow figures.
8:28 – I was being called a racist because the snow couple is white.
8:30 – I used food colouring to make one of the snow couple a different colour and be more racially inclusive.
8:37 – Then I was accused of using a black face on the snowperson.
8:39 – The middle eastern gent across the road demanded the snow woman be completely covered.
8:40 – The police arrived saying someone had been offended.
8:42 – The feminist neighbor complained again that the broomstick of the snow woman needed to be removed because it depicted women in a domestic role.
8:43 – The ‘council on equality’ officer arrived and threatened me with eviction.
8:45 – TV news crew from ABC showed up. I was asked if I know the difference between snowmen and snow-women? I replied “Snowballs” and am now a sexist.
9:00 – I was on the news as a suspected terrorist, racist, homophobe, and sensibility offender, bent on stirring up trouble during difficult weather.
9:10 – I was asked if I have any accomplices. My children were taken by social services.
9:29 – Far left protesters offended by everything, marched down the street demanding that I be arrested.
9:45 – The boss called and fired me because of the negative association with work that had been all over social media.
10:00 – I cry into my drink because all I wanted to do was build a snowman…
Moral: There isn’t any moral to this story…… It is just what this world has become, because of a bunch of snowflakes.