Category: Humor

Sleeping Around

Dave

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If Women Controlled the World

Dave

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Ralph the Chicken

Dave

Ralph came home drunk one night, slid into bed beside his sleeping wife, and fell into a deep slumber. He awoke before the Pearly Gates, where St. Peter said,‚Äö√Ñ√¥ you died in your sleep, Ralph. ‚Äö√ѬÆRalph was stunned. I’m dead?…

The Bet…

Dave

Two families move from Pakistan to America . When they arrive the two fathers make a bet to see — in a year’s time — which family has become more Americanized. A year later they meet again. The first man…

Pet Fish

Dave

A redneck was stopped by a game warden recently with two ice chests full of fish. He was leaving a cove that’s well-known for its fishing. The game warden asked the man… “Do you have a license to catch those…

Cure for a Cough

Dave

The owner of a drugstore walks in to find a guy leaning heavily against a wall with an odd look on his face. The owner asks the clerk, “What’s with that guy over there by the wall?” The clerk says,…

Jane & Arlene

Dave

Jane and Arlene are outside the nursing home, having a drink and a smoke, when it starts to rain. Jane pulls out a condom, cuts off the end, puts it over her cigarette, and continues smoking. Arlene: What in the…

A Fairy Tale

Dave

One day, long, long ago, there was this woman who surprisingly, did not whine, nag, and bitch…….. But this was a long time ago…..and it was just ONE day. The End Related Posts Wisdom of an Older Man Elderly Friends…

Christmas Cookie Recipe

Dave

Ingredients: 1 cup of water 1 tsp baking soda 1 cup of sugar 1 tsp salt 1 cup of brown sugar Lemon juice 4 large eggs 1 cup nuts 2 cups of dried fruit 1 bottle Crown Royal Instructions: –…

How Real Men Use Post-It Notes!

Dave

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Wrapping Paper

Dave

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Stun Gun

Dave

Pocket Taser Stun Gun, a great gift for the wife. A guy who purchased his lovely wife a pocket Taser for their anniversary submitted this : Last weekend I saw something at Larry’s Pistol & Pawn Shop that sparked my…

West Virginia Mountain Woman

Dave

A West Virginia mountain woman went to the doctor and was told to go home and come back in a couple of days with a specimen. When she got home, she asked her husband, “What is a specimen?” He replied,…

Laundry

Dave

A woman was unhappy with the way her laundry was done at the local Chinese Laundry, so she wrote a note and put it in the bag with the next collection of soiled clothes : “USE MORE SOAP ON PANTIES!”…

10 New Work Rules

Dave

It has been brought to management’s attention that some individuals throughout the company have been using foul language during the course of normal conversation with their co-workers. Due to complaints received from some employees who may be easily offended, this…

How to Decide who to Marry:

Dave

How to Decide who to Marry: You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming. — Alan,…

Wyoming Cowboy

Dave

A WYOMING cowboy was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust cloud towards him. The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban Sunglasses and…

Three Quaterbacks

Dave

God asks Peyton Manning first: “What do u believe?” Peyton thinks long and hard, looks God in the eye, and says, “I believe in hard work and staying true to family and friends. I believe in giving. I was lucky,…

Dead Goldfish

Dave

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