Garage Owner
He was sick and tired of thugs breaking into his garage shop to steal tools, etc. So he came up with this idea. He put the word out that he had a Lion that would attack anyone that would break…
He was sick and tired of thugs breaking into his garage shop to steal tools, etc. So he came up with this idea. He put the word out that he had a Lion that would attack anyone that would break…
There I was sitting at the bar staring at my drink when a large, trouble-making biker steps up next to me, grabs my drink and gulps it down in one swig. “Well, whatcha’ gonna do about it?” he says, menacingly,…
Before you read to the end, does anybody know what the main ingredient of WD-40 is? Don’t lie and don’t cheat. WD-40. Who knew; I had a neighbor who bought a new pickup. I got up very early one Sunday…
A guy goes to the Nv. State High way Dept. to apply for a job. The interviewer asks him, “Are you allergic to anything?” He replies, “Yes, caffeine. I can’t drink coffee.” “Ok, Have you ever been in the military…
A young New York woman was so depressed that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the ocean. But just before she could throw herself from the docks, a handsome young man stopped her. “You have so…
To good home–excellent guard dog. Owner cannot afford to feed him anymore, as there are no more drug pushers, thieves, murderers, or molesters left in the neighborhood for him to eat. Most of them knew Jethro only by his Oriental…
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The teacher asked the class to use the word ‘fascinate’ in a sentence. Molly put up her hand and said, ‘My family went to my granddad’s farm, and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating. The teacher said,…
Once upon a time, there was a young lad was born without a belly button. In its place was a silver screw.¬† All the doctors told his mother that there was nothing they could do. Like it or not, he…
An elderly Floridian called 911 on her cell phone to report that her car has been broken into. She is hysterical as she explains her situation to the dispatcher: ‘They’ve stolen the stereo, the steering wheel, the brake pedal and…
As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his car phone rang. Answering, he heard his wife’s voice urgently warning him, ‘Herman, I just heard on the news that there’s a car going the wrong way on Interstate 77.…
Two elderly ladies had been friends for many decades. Over the years, they had shared all kinds of activities and adventures. Lately, their activities had been limited to meeting a few times a week to play cards. One day, they…
Some buddies and I heard that they recently opened a Hooters restaurant in Tokyo, so we decided to go check it out. Here was some of the waitresses. The food was good and decently priced, but the weird thing was…
Three retirees, each with a hearing loss, were playing golf one fine March day. One remarked to the other, ‘Windy, isn’t it?’ ‘No,’ the second man replied, ‘it’s Thursday.’ And the third man chimed in, ‘So am I. Let’s have…
Three sisters, ages 92, 94 and 96, live in a house together. One night the 96-year-old draws a bath. She puts her foot in and pauses. She yells to the other sisters, ‘Was I getting in or out of the…
The wife and I were at home watching TV. I had the remote and was switching back and forth between a fishing channel and the porn channel. She became more and more annoyed and finally said: “For God’s sake! Leave…