Author: Dave
10 New Work Rules
It has been brought to management’s attention that some individuals throughout the company have been using foul language during the course of normal conversation with their co-workers. Due to complaints received from some employees who may be easily offended, this…
How to Decide who to Marry:
How to Decide who to Marry: You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming. — Alan,…
Wyoming Cowboy
A WYOMING cowboy was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust cloud towards him. The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban Sunglasses and…
Three Quaterbacks
God asks Peyton Manning first: “What do u believe?” Peyton thinks long and hard, looks God in the eye, and says, “I believe in hard work and staying true to family and friends. I believe in giving. I was lucky,…
Dead Goldfish
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Moved To Alaska
Tom had been in the liquor business for 25 years. Finally sick of the stress he quits his job and buys 50 acres of land in Alaska as far from humanity as possible. He sees the postman once a week…
We Do Not Spank
Most of America’s populace think it improper to spank children, so I have tried other methods to control my kids when they have one of “those moments.” One that I found effective is for me to just take the child…
Air Force Assignments
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Minorities – Show Some Compassion
They travel miles in the heat. They risk their lives crossing a border. They don’t get paid enough wages. They do jobs that others won’t do or are afraid to do. They live in crowded conditions among a people who…
The Flasher
Three older ladies named Rose, Pam and Martha were sitting on a park bench having a quiet conversation when a flasher approached from across the park.¬¨‚Ć The flasher came up to the ladies, stood right in front of them and…
Another Use For Duct Tape
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Picture Proof of a Bad Day
Even when you are having a really bad day, someone will still screw you. Related Posts How is Your Day Going? Put Your Foot in Your Mouth Anger Management
Fireman Sex
A fireman came home from work one day and told his wife, ‘You know, we have a wonderful system at the fire station: Bell 1 rings and we all put on our jackets, Bell 2 rings and we all slide…
Happy Thanksgiving
Wishing everybody a Happy Thanksgiving. We hope your day is filled with many thanks, spending time with family or friends, and doing something you enjoy. If you would like to take this opportunity to send a text message to say…
Howzit Brahdah
Brahdah‚ came home drunk one night, slid into bed beside his sleeping wife, and fell into a deep slumber. He awoke before the Pearly Gates, where St. Peter said, ‘You died in your sleep, Brahdah.’ Brahdah was stunned. ‘I’m dead?…
Attention All Voters: Here’s a Bumper Sticker For You
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Divorce vs. Murder
A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, walked up to the pharmacist,¬¨‚Ćlooked straight into his eyes,and said, ‘I would like to buy some cyanide.’ ¬¨‚ĆThe pharmacist asked, ‘Why in the world do you need cyanide?’ ¬¨‚ĆThe lady…