Month: September 2016

Demonstration of Love

Dave

A group of women were at a seminar on how to live in a loving relationship with their husbands. The women were asked, “How many of you love your husband?” All the women raised their hands.

Then they were asked, “When was the last time you told your husband you loved him?

“Some women answered today, a few yesterday, and some couldn’t remember.

The women were then told to take out their cell phones and text their husband – “I love you, Sweetheart”

Next the women were instructed to exchange phones with one another and read aloud the text message they received in response to their message.

Below are hilarious replies. If you have been married for quite a while, you understand that these replies are a sign of true love. Who else would reply in such a succinct and honest way?

1. Who the hell is this?
2. Eh, mother of my children, are you sick or what?
3. Yeah, and I love you too. What’s wrong?
4. What now? Did you wreck the car again?
5. I don’t understand what you mean?
6. What the hell did you do now?
7. Don’t beat about the bush, just tell me how much you need?
8. Am I dreaming?
9. If you don’t tell me who this message is actually for, someone will die.
10. I thought we agreed you wouldn’t drink during the day.
11. Your mother is coming to stay with us, isn’t she?

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Donkey

Dave

The king wanted to go fishing. He called on the royal weather forecaster and inquired as to the weather forecast for the next few hours. The weatherman assured him that there was no chance of rain in the coming days.

So the king went fishing with his wife, the queen. On the way he met a farmer on his donkey. Upon seeing the king the farmer said, “Your Majesty, you should return to the palace! In just a short time I expect a huge amount of rain to fall in this area”.

The king was polite and considerate, he replied: “I hold the palace meteorologist in high regard. He is an extensively educated and experienced professional. And besides, I pay him very high wages. He gave me a very different forecast. I trust him.”

So the king continued on his way. However, a short time later a torrential rain fell from the sky. The King and Queen were totally soaked and their entourage chuckled upon seeing them in such a shameful condition.

Furious, the king returned to the palace and gave the order to fire the professional. Then he summoned the farmer and offered him the prestigious and high paying role of royal forecaster.

The farmer said, “Your Majesty, I do not know anything about forecasting. I obtain my information from my donkey. If I see my donkey’s ears drooping, it means with certainty that it will rain.” So the king hired the donkey.

And thus began the practice of hiring dumb asses to work in the government and occupy its highest and most influential positions. The practice is unbroken to this day and the Democrat symbol was born.

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Historical Old Photos in Color

Dave

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Henry Ford, 1919

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Cornell Rowing Team 1914

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Brothers Robert Kennedy, Edward ‘Ted’ Kennedy and John F. Kennedy outside the Oval Office.

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Sophia Loren and Jayne Mansfield

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Two Boxers after a fight

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Brooklyn Bridge in 1904

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Louis Armstrong plays to his wife, Lucille, in Cairo, Egypt 1961

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An Oklahoman farmer during the great dust bowl in 1939

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Boys buying flowers in 1908

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Red Hawk of the Oglala Tribe on horseback 1905

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WWII soldiers on Easter

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Union Soldiers taking a break 1863

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Madison Square Park New York City around 1900

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Burger Flipper 1938

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Helen Keller meeting comedian Charlie Chaplin in 1918

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Lee Harvey Oswald, 1963, being transported to questioning before his murder trial for the assassination of President John F. Kennedy.

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Times Square 1947

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Lou Gehrig, July 4, 1939. Photo taken right after his famous retirement speech. He would pass away just two years later from ALS.

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Girls delivering ice, 1918

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Louis Armstrong practicing backstage in 1946

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American Poet Walt Whitman, 1868

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Baltimore Slums, 1938

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View from the Capitol in Nashville, 1864

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Clint Eastwood working on his 1958 Jag XK 120 in 1960

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Babe Ruth’s 1920 MLB debut

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An RAF pilot getting a haircut while reading a book between missions

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Joan Crawford on the set of Letty Lynton, 1932

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Marilyn Monroe

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1920s Australian mugshots from the New South Wales Police Dept.

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W.H. Murphy testing the bulletproof vest in 1923

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Unemployed Lumber Worker and His Wife 1939

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Country store in July 1939 Gordonton, North Carolina

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Winston Churchill, 1941

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Samurai Training 1860

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Albert Einstein on a Long Island beach in 1939

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British Soldiers Returning from the front in 1939

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Hindenburg Blimp crash

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Clint Eastwood, 1962

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Charles Darwin

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Big Jay McNeely, Olympic Auditorium, 1953

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Alfred Hitchcock

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Elizabeth Taylor in 1956

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Pablo Picasso

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Brigadier General and actor Jimmy Stewart. Stewart flew 20 combat missions over Nazi-occupied Europe, and even flew one mission during Vietnam.

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Albert Einstein, 1921

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A car crash in Washington D.C. around 1921

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Claude Monet in 1923

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Charlie Chaplin at 27 years old in 1916

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Mark Twain in 1900

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Audrey Hepburn

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Nazi Minister of Propaganda Joseph Goebbels scowls at a Jewish photographer, 1933

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Washington, D. C. filling station in 1924

 

President Lincoln with Major General McClernand and Allan Pinkerton at Antietam in 1862

 

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Kansas City Southern Train

Dave

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I was in traffic, looked over, saw this train, and snapped a quick photo of it. It made me wonder, was it this train that got somebody out of this town? Did this train bring somebody into this town? Was this train the one where people dreams began or was it the one where they ended? Whichever it was, this vessel was the backbone that carried those aspirations and burdens. It must be quite the vessel.

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