Buy a Vowel
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Category: Humor
The Computer Swallowed Grandma Poem
The computer swallowed Grandma, Yes, honestly it’s true! She pressed ‘control and ‘enter’ And disappeared from view. It devoured her completely, The thought just makes me squirm. She must have caught a virus Or been eaten by a worm. I’ve…
Where Did She Put the Case of Beer?
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Today’s word is: Fluctuations
I was at my bank today; there was a short line. There was just one lady in front of me, an Asian lady who was trying to exchange yen for dollars. It was obvious she was a little irritated .…
How to Get Arrested
This actually happened with some guys from Maine . They dressed the truck up with the guy spread-eagled on the roof. The driver and passengers put on Moose heads. They went down the Maine interstate toll road, causing 16 accidents.…
Vote for Parent of the Year 2012
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Your Horse Called
A man was sitting reading his papers when his wife hit him round the head with a frying pan. ‘What was that for?’ the man asked. The wife replied ‘That was for the piece of paper with the name Jenny…
Motivational Posters #9
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Medical News
Medical science has finally found the correct and most accurate way to measure blood pressure for men. Related Posts Sydney University Beer Study 2016 Academy Awards Man of the Hour Male or Female?
Advances in RT(RedneckTechnology)
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Christmas Shopping
A couple was Christmas shopping on Christmas Eve and the whole place was heaving, packed with other last minute shoppers. Walking through the shopping centre the surprised wife looked up from a window display and noticed her husband was nowhere…
Sperm Count
An 85-year-old man was requested by his Doctor for a sperm count as part of his physical exam. The doctor gave the man a jar and said, ‘Take this jar home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow.’ The next…
Complete vs. Finished
It has been said that no English dictionary has been able to adequately explain the difference between COMPLETE and FINISHED. However, in a recent linguistic conference held in London , England , and attended by some of the best linguists…
Strong Coffee
An Irish woman of advanced age visited her physician to ask his advice on reviving her husband’s libido. ‘What about trying Viagra?’ asked the doctor. ‘Not a chance’, she said… ‘He won’t even take an aspirin.’ ‘Not a problem,’ replied…
A Pilot Father’s Tough Love
Since I’m a pilot, one method that I have found very effective is for me to just take the child for a short flight during which I say nothing and give the child the opportunity to reflect on his or…
The Penis Poem by Willie Nelson
My nookie days are over, My pilot light is out. What used to be my sex appeal, Is now my water spout. Time was when, on its own accord, From my trousers it would spring. But now I’ve got a…
Are You From Ireland?
I was in a pub last Saturday night, drank quite a few, and noticed two very large women by the bar. They both had pretty strong accents, so I asked, “Hey, are you two ladies from Ireland?” One of them…
