Month: July 2008

Golfing Nun Cursed

Dave

A nun walks into Mother Superior’s office and plunks down into a chair; she lets out a sigh heavy with frustration. ‘ What troubles you, Sister?’ asked the Mother Superior, ‘I thought this was the day you spent with your…

E-Tail and Retail Stores

Dave

[Abstract] The purpose of this document is to provide an increased or basic knowledge and a comparison of online and retail stores. Also included in this document is a comparison of how buying a product online differs from buying a…

Aloha Hawaii, Konnichiwa Japan

Dave

Well, there comes a time in everyone’s life where you come to a fork in the road on your path to the future. My road has came to that fork and I have chosen to move to Japan. For the…

Hearing Problems

Dave

An elderly gentleman had serious hearing problems for a number of years. He went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100%. The…

Words Women Use:

Dave

1.) FINE: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up. 2.) FIVE MINUTES: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five Minutes is only…

Golf Sign in Arizona

Dave

Here is an actual sign posted at a golf club in Scottsdale, Arizona: 1. BACK STRAIGHT, KNEES BENT, FEET SHOULDER WIDTH APART. 2. FORM A LOOSE GRIP. 3. KEEP YOUR HEAD DOWN. 4. AVOID A QUICK BACK SWING. 5. STAY…

This is One Pissed Off Cat

Dave

Related Posts A Woman’s Orgasm Isn’t Necessary If She Has Small Boobs You Can Still Motorboat Someone Left Their Blowup Doll on the Airplane United We Stand, With Biden We Fall

Drunk Walks Out of a Bar

Dave

A drunk walks out of a bar with a key in his hand and he is stumbling back and forth. A cop on the beat sees him and approaches “Can I help you sir?” “Yessh! Ssssomebody ssstole my carrr” the…

New Wiper Blades

Dave

I got a new set of wiper blades on my car. I think they might be too long because they hang over the edges a little, but I don’t care, they work great. I would have to say that they…

Bobby Ray and Susie May Getting Down

Dave

Bobby Ray and Susie Jane were fooling around out in the cornfield when Bobby Ray said, “Oh Susie Jane, I am getting so horny, you just have to let me have some.” Susie Jane said, “Well, maybe I will, but…

Information Systems and Users

Dave

[Abstract] The purpose of this document is to provide an increased or basic knowledge of how users interact with information systems by utilizing input and output devices, computer performance factors, network performance issues, and correlating them to the online virtual…

New Cowboy Boots

Dave

An elderly couple, Margaret and Bert, moved to Texas, ‚Ä®Bert always wanted a pair of authentic cowboy boots, so, seeing some on sale, he bought them and wore them home. ‚Ä®‚Ä® Walking proudly, he sauntered into the kitchen and‚Ä® said…

Robot Lie Detector

Dave

John was a salesman’s delight when it came to any kind of unusual gimmick. His wife Marsha has long ago given up trying to get him to change. One day, John came home about noon and told Marsha that he…

Evolution of the Television

Dave

Related Posts A Taste of Freedom Joe Biden The Magician Men Wearing Dresses Celebrate Mother’s Day Today Busy Night at Stone Henge as Workers Move all the Stones Forward One Hour

Dusty Underwear

Dave

One evening a husband, thinking he was being funny, said to his wife “Perhaps we should start washing your clothes in Slim Fast. Maybe it would take a few inches off of your butt!!” His wife was not amused, and…

Buried at Sea

Dave

Bubbles and Barbie, two blonde sisters had promised their Uncle, who had been a seafaring gentleman all his life, to bury him at sea when he died. Of course, in due time, he did pass away and the two blondes…

Lil’ Johnny Strikes Again…

Dave

Teacher asks kindergarten students what kind of medicines they know and what they are used for. First pupil: “Tylenol?” Teacher: “Very good! And what is it used for?” Pupil: “It is used for headaches” Second pupil: “Nytol Teacher” Teacher: “Excellent.…

Take a Drop Guys!

Dave

There is a reason you don’t go into the weeds where it’s warm and wet looking for your golfball! Related Posts Golf Sign in Arizona You Know You’re in Texas When… Golf Wisdom

Two Prostitutes – $50.00

Dave

Two prostitutes were riding around town with a sign on top of their car which read: ‘Two Prostitutes — $50.00.’ Suddenly a passing patrol officer spotted the sign displayed on the top of their car, stopped them, and warned them…