Motivational Posters #8
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Month: December 2011
The Devil and the Old Man
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Big People Words
A group of kindergartners were trying very hard to become accustomed to the first grade. The biggest hurdle they faced was that the teacher insisted on NO baby talk! You need to use ‘Big People words,’ she was always reminding…
Mood Buttons You Can’t Wear to Work
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First Time at the Spa
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Home Security Yard Sign
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A Frugal Person’s Christmas Decorations
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Here is an actual sign posted at a golf club in Scotland UK:
1. BACK STRAIGHT, KNEES BENT, FEET SHOULDER WIDTH APART. 2. FORM A LOOSE GRIP. 3. KEEP YOUR HEAD DOWN! 4. AVOID A QUICK BACK SWING. 5. STAY OUT OF THE WATER. 6. TRY NOT TO HIT ANYONE. 7. IF YOU…
Thirsty Taliban
A fleeing Taliban, desperate for water, was plodding through the Afghan desert when he saw something far off in the distance. Hoping to find water, he hurried toward the oasis, only to find a little old Jewish man at a…
Proof That The World Is Nuts
In Lebanon, men are legally allowed to have sex with animals, but the animals must be female. Having sexual relations with a male animal is punishable by death. (Like THAT makes sense!) In Bahrain, a male doctor may legally examine…
They Can’t Be At WalMart All the Time
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Photo of a Wife
The old man goes to answer a knock at the door one evening only to find two sherrif deputy’s standing there. “Sir, are you married?” One deputy asked. “Why yes,” the old man replied “for 48 years.” “Do you have…
The Great Barroom Miscommunication of the Century
I was standing at the bar and this Chinese guy comes in and stands next to me…I said to him, “Do you know any of those martial arts things, like Kung-Fu, Karate or Ju-Jitsu?” He says “No, why the fluck…
New Clothing Shop
There’s a new Muslim clothing shop that opened in our shopping center, but they threw me out after I asked if I could look at some of the bomber jackets. Related Posts Unattended Baggage Jeff Foxworthy on Muslims Prevent Terrorists…
Apple Scrapped Their Plans for a New Product
I’ve heard that Apple has scrapped their plans for the new children’s-oriented iPod after realizing that “iTouch Kids” is not a good product name. Related Posts iPod Touch How the iPhone Changed the World Forever — The Dawn of the…
Prepare for the Worst
My wife has been missing a week now. The police said to prepare for the worst. So, I went down to Goodwill to get all of her clothes back. Related Posts The Husband’s T-shirt Socially Unacceptable Humor Christmas lights
Talking Behind My Back
A wife says to her husband “You’re always pushing me around and talking behind my back.” And he says “What do you expect? You’re in a wheelchair!” Related Posts Hospital Regulations Hospital Regulations Bus Seat
My Wife is Dead
A man calls 911 and says “I think my wife is dead”. The operator says, “How do you know?” He says “The sex is about the same, but the ironing is piling up!” Related Posts Love’s Fiery Revenge: A Tale…