SMART ASS ANSWER #6 It was mealtime during an airline flight. ‘Would you like dinner?’, the flight attendant asked John, seated in front.. ‘What are my choices?’ John asked. ‘Yes or no,’ she replied. SMART ASS ANSWER #5 A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As a man approached, she …
Category: Humor
New Store
Two businessmen in a new shopping mall were sitting down for a break in their soon-to-be new shop… As yet, the shop wasn’t ready, with only a few shelves set up. One said to the other, “I bet any minute now some pensioner is going to walk by, put their face to the window, and ask what …
Little Johnny Famous Quotes
A teacher decides to let students out early if they can name some quote origins. Teacher: “Who said ‘Four Score and Seven Years Ago’?” Before Johnny can open his mouth, Susie says, “Abraham Lincoln.” “That’s right, Susie, you can go home.” Teacher: “Who said ‘I Have a Dream’?” Before Johnny can open his mouth, Mary …
Meanwhile in Minnesota…
It’s been snowing all night. So the morning goes like this; 8:00 I made a snowman. 8:10 A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn’t make a snow woman. 8:15 So, I made a snow woman. 8:17 The nanny of the neighbors complained about the snow woman’s voluptuous chest. 8:20 The gay couple …
Humorous Taxi Driver Conversations
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Incontinent Hotline
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Glory Years From Healthy Living
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Spend Quality Time Together
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Difference Between Armies
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Cherish Being a Senior Airman
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Name Not Instruction
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Save Paper
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Bank Calendar
You know you are getting old when your bank sends you their calendar one month at a time. Related Posts Leap Year in the USA: Calendar Tricks, Celestial Dance, and the Quirky Tradition of Proposing Playfully Homeland Security: Grocery Store China ATM Warns Don’t Transfer Money to Strangers
Washington D.C. Ticket Agent
Please say some stupid things and a Washington D.C. Ticket Agent shares some of the things they have heard. 1. I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman (Carol Shea-Porter) ask for an aisle seat so that her hair wouldn’t get messed up by being near the window. (On an airplane!) 2. I got a call from …
Public Appearance
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Memory Gets Any Worse
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Forgotten Hotel Room
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Don’t Forget Your Password
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Which is Blonde?
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My Favorite Excuses
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Going to Home Depot
You are in the middle of some home projects: putting in a new fence, painting the porch, planting some flowers and fixing a broken door lock. You are hot and sweaty, covered with dirt, lawn clippings and paint. You have your old work clothes on. You know the outfit — shorts with a hole in …
The Future is Here
Hello…is this Gordon’s Pizza? No sir, it’s Google Pizza. I must have dialed a wrong number. Sorry. No sir, Google bought Gordon’s Pizza last month. OK. I would like to order a pizza. Do you want your usual, sir? My usual? You know me? According to our caller ID data sheet, the last 12 times …
Wine Signs
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It’s Been a While…Smile
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Texas Signs
Only in Texas will you see signs like these . . . Related Posts Ocean Beach Hippies Unite! Bike Lane Bush 2004 Sticker Funny Watch the Gap Sign
A Short History Lesson
1923, Who Was: 1. President of the largest steel company? 2. President of the largest gas company? 3. President of the New York stock Exchange? 4. Greatest wheat speculator? 5. President of the Bank of International Settlement? 6.Great Bear of Wall Street? These men were considered some of the worlds most successful of their days…Now, …
Jewish Cab Driver
A clearly inebriated woman, stark naked, jumped into a taxi in New York City and laid on the back seat. The cab driver, an old Jewish gentleman, opened his eyes wide and stared at the woman. He made no attempt to start the cab. The woman glared back at him and said, “What’s wrong with …
Wine For Dinner
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Catholic Morning Coffee
Four old Catholic men and a Catholic woman were having coffee in St. Peters Square. The first Catholic man tells his friends, “My son is a priest, when he walks into a room, everyone calls him ‘Father’.” The second Catholic man chirps, “My son is a Bishop. When he walks into a room people call …
The Next Generation
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In the Hood
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