Tag: Humor

Stop, Thief!

This Property is a Farm Notice

Dog Has a Gun

Good in Bed

Auto Repair Price List

Pull Up Your Pants for Service

Leave the Bubble Wrap Alone

We’ll Always be Best Friends

Don’t Die a Virgin

Not Falling For That Again

A Dog Needs a Home

The Ten Condiments

Relaxing Game of Golf

Explicit Language Warning.

Follow the Doctor’s Advice

Morris, an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor to get a physical. A few days later, the doctor saw Morris walking down the street with a gorgeous young woman on his arm. A couple of days later, the doctor spoke to Morris and said, ‘You’re really doing great, aren’t you?’ Morris replied, ‘Just doing …

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State of the Art Hearing Aid

A man was telling his neighbor, “I just bought a new hearing aid. It cost me four thousand dollars, but it’s state of the art. It’s perfect.” “Really,” answered the neighbor. “What kind is it?” “Twelve thirty.”

Why Are You Getting Married?

A senior citizen said to his eighty-year old buddy: “So I hear you’re getting married?” “Yep!” “Do I know her?” “Nope!” “This woman, is she good looking?” “Not really.” “Is she a good cook?” “Nah, she can’t cook too well.” “Does she have lots of money?” “Nope! Poor as a church mouse.” “Well, then, is …

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Hospital Regulations

Hospital regulations require a wheel chair for patients being discharged.  However, while working as a student nurse, I found one elderly gentleman already dressed and sitting on the bed with a suitcase at his feet, who insisted he didn’t need my help to leave the hospital.  After a chat about rules being rules, he reluctantly let me …

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Thinking About Sex

What’s the Name of That Restaurant

An elderly couple had dinner at another couple’s house, and after eating, the wives left the table and went into the kitchen. The two gentlemen were talking, and one said, ‘Last night we went out to a new restaurant and it was really great I would recommend it very highly.’ The other man said, ‘What …

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Palm Sunday

Third Worm on Noah’s Ark

The Haircut

One day a florist went to a barber for a haircut. After the cut, he asked about his bill, and the barber replied, “I cannot accept money from you, I’m doing community service this week.”  The florist was pleased and left the shop. When the barber went to open his shop the next morning, there …

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Moses’ Mother

I Don’t Always Bark at Night

Groundhog Day 2019

Six more weeks of winter.

Thank You For All You Give Me

Some Days Start Great

Posing For a Photo

Moment You Are Beautiful

What Scientists Believe They Know About Breasts

Put the Drops In