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Tag: stupidity
A Retired Person’s Perspective
1. I’m not saying let’s go kill all the stupid people. I’m just saying let’s remove all the warning labels and let the problem work itself out. 2. I changed my car horn to gunshot sounds. People move out of the way much faster now. 3. You can tell a lot about a woman’s mood …
Aphorisms for the Year
– It’s not whether you win or lose, but how you place the blame. – We have enough “youth.” How about a fountain of “smart”? – A Fool and his money can throw one heck of a party. – When blondes have more fun, do they know it? – Learn from your parent’s mistakes — …
The Real Laws
1.Law of Mechanical Repair – After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you’ll have to pee. 2.Law of Gravity – Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible place in the universe. 3.Law of Probability – The probability of being watched is directly …
Winning
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2011 Darwin Awards
You’ve been waiting for them with bated breath, so without further ado, here are the 2011 Darwin Awards: Eighth Place In Detroit, a 41-year-old man got stuck and drowned in two feet of water after squeezing head first through an 18-inch-wide sewer grate to retrieve his car keys. Seventh Place A 49-year-old San Francisco stockbroker, …