Tag: jokes

Please Be Patient

Good in Bed

Auto Repair Price List

Leave the Bubble Wrap Alone

For the Love of Bacon

Don’t Die a Virgin

Ice Cream Parlor

A little old man shuffled slowly into an ice cream parlor and pulled himself slowly, painfully, up onto a stool… After catching his breath, he ordered a banana split. The waitress asked kindly, ‘Crushed nuts?’ ‘No,’ he replied, ‘Arthritis.’

State of the Art Hearing Aid

A man was telling his neighbor, “I just bought a new hearing aid. It cost me four thousand dollars, but it’s state of the art. It’s perfect.” “Really,” answered the neighbor. “What kind is it?” “Twelve thirty.”

Why Are You Getting Married?

A senior citizen said to his eighty-year old buddy: “So I hear you’re getting married?” “Yep!” “Do I know her?” “Nope!” “This woman, is she good looking?” “Not really.” “Is she a good cook?” “Nah, she can’t cook too well.” “Does she have lots of money?” “Nope! Poor as a church mouse.” “Well, then, is …

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Hospital Regulations

Hospital regulations require a wheel chair for patients being discharged.  However, while working as a student nurse, I found one elderly gentleman already dressed and sitting on the bed with a suitcase at his feet, who insisted he didn’t need my help to leave the hospital.  After a chat about rules being rules, he reluctantly let me …

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Thinking About Sex

Third Worm on Noah’s Ark

Moses’ Mother

Groundhog Day 2019

Six more weeks of winter.

How I lost My Teeth

Thank You For All You Give Me

Some Days Start Great

Posing For a Photo

Moment You Are Beautiful

What Scientists Believe They Know About Breasts

Put the Drops In

Do it for the Kids

Entice Men to do Stupid Stuff

Behind Every Woman

Do Clouds Look Down on Us

Deep Thoughts

Bookseller Market Survey

Bookseller conducting a market survey asked a woman – “Which book has helped you most in your life?” The woman replied, “My husband’s check book!!”

Breast Height Check

Getting older stinks and so do these measurements.

Can’t You Ever Relax?

Forgetful Folks Support Group

Teach Children About Taxes