Related Posts A Taste of Freedom Joe Biden The Magician Men Wearing Dresses Celebrate Mother’s Day Today Busy Night at Stone Henge as Workers Move all the Stones Forward One Hour
Tag: laugh
Christmas Shopping
A couple was Christmas shopping on Christmas Eve and the whole place was heaving, packed with other last minute shoppers. Walking through the shopping centre the surprised wife looked up from a window display and noticed her husband was nowhere to be seen. She knew they had lots still to do and she became very …
Sperm Count
An 85-year-old man was requested by his Doctor for a sperm count as part of his physical exam. The doctor gave the man a jar and said, ‘Take this jar home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow.’ The next day the 85-year-old man reappeared at the do ctor’s office and gave him the jar, …
Complete vs. Finished
It has been said that no English dictionary has been able to adequately explain the difference between COMPLETE and FINISHED. However, in a recent linguistic conference held in London , England , and attended by some of the best linguists in the world, Samsundar Balgobin, a Guyanese, was the clear winner. His final challenge was …
Strong Coffee
An Irish woman of advanced age visited her physician to ask his advice on reviving her husband’s libido. ‘What about trying Viagra?’ asked the doctor. ‘Not a chance’, she said… ‘He won’t even take an aspirin.’ ‘Not a problem,’ replied the doctor. ‘Give him an ‘Irish Viagra’… ‘What is Irish Viagra?’, she asked. It’s when …
A Pilot Father’s Tough Love
Since I’m a pilot, one method that I have found very effective is for me to just take the child for a short flight during which I say nothing and give the child the opportunity to reflect on his or her behavior. I don’t know whether it’s the steady vibration from the engines, or just …
The Penis Poem by Willie Nelson
My nookie days are over, My pilot light is out. What used to be my sex appeal, Is now my water spout. Time was when, on its own accord, From my trousers it would spring. But now I’ve got a full time job, To find the f***in’ thing. It used to be embarrassing, The way …
Are You From Ireland?
I was in a pub last Saturday night, drank quite a few, and noticed two very large women by the bar. They both had pretty strong accents, so I asked, “Hey, are you two ladies from Ireland?” One of them snapped back saying, “It’s WALES , you friggin’ idiot!” So, I immediately apologized and said, …
Too True
Related Posts A Taste of Freedom Joe Biden The Magician Men Wearing Dresses Celebrate Mother’s Day Today Busy Night at Stone Henge as Workers Move all the Stones Forward One Hour
Men
A man was granted two wishes by God, he asked for the best drink & the best woman ever. Next moment he got mineral water & Mother Teresa. ********************************************************* There are 3 kinds of men in this world. Some remain single and make wonders happen. Some have girlfriends and see wonders happen. Rest get married …
Retirement Occupation
As we get older we sometimes begin to doubt our ability to “make a difference” in the world. It is at these times that our hopes are boosted by the remarkable achievements of other “seniors” who have found the courage to take on challenges that would make many of us wither. Harold Schlumberg is such …
Mounted Policeman
This is nothing like the relationship between a man and his horse! Related Posts Do Not Smack a Cop’s Horse Roping Horse Races
Motorcycle Gas Tank
Related Posts A Taste of Freedom Joe Biden The Magician Men Wearing Dresses Celebrate Mother’s Day Today Busy Night at Stone Henge as Workers Move all the Stones Forward One Hour
Poop Trucks Are Funny
Related Posts A Taste of Freedom Joe Biden The Magician Men Wearing Dresses Celebrate Mother’s Day Today Busy Night at Stone Henge as Workers Move all the Stones Forward One Hour
2012 Social Security Stimulus Package
Just wanted to let you know – today I received my 2012 Social Security Stimulus Package. It contained two tomato seeds, cornbread mix, a prayer rug, a machine to blow smoke up my ass, 2 discount coupons to KFC, an “Obama Hope & Change” bumper sticker, and a “Blame it on Bush” poster for the …
Partnership
Related Posts A Taste of Freedom Joe Biden The Magician Men Wearing Dresses Celebrate Mother’s Day Today Busy Night at Stone Henge as Workers Move all the Stones Forward One Hour
Girl Scouts
Related Posts A Taste of Freedom Joe Biden The Magician Men Wearing Dresses Celebrate Mother’s Day Today Busy Night at Stone Henge as Workers Move all the Stones Forward One Hour
Those Darn Pills
The sex between the wife and me had been a bit unsatisfying of late, So she told me, “Go to the pharmacy and get some of those pills that will help you to get an erection.” You can imagine her reaction when I came back from the drug store and tossed her the diet pills!……damn …
The New Italian Lamborghini Gallardo Police Car
The new Italian Lamborghini Gallardo police car at its unveiling ceremony, one of two new high speed patrol cars in the Italian police force, needed to catch speeding drivers: What a car! Pity they couldn’t find someone who could drive it… Mamma Mia! Related Posts Be Careful When You Have a Fast Car, it Could …
Sensitive Men’s Stories
1. I was walking through the cemetery this morning and saw a guy crouching down behind a tombstone. I said, “Morning.” He said, “No, just taking a shit”. 2. When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bike. Then I realized that the Lord doesn’t work that way, so …
Church Signs
Related Posts A Taste of Freedom Joe Biden The Magician Men Wearing Dresses Celebrate Mother’s Day Today Busy Night at Stone Henge as Workers Move all the Stones Forward One Hour
Banking on a Bet: The Curious Case of Round Testicles and Square Bets
An elderly woman walked into the Bank of Canada one morning with a purse full of money. She wanted to open a savings account and insisted on talking to the president of the Bank because, she said, she had a lot of money. After many lengthy discussions (after all, the client is always right) an …
Billboards
Related Posts A Taste of Freedom Joe Biden The Magician Men Wearing Dresses Celebrate Mother’s Day Today Busy Night at Stone Henge as Workers Move all the Stones Forward One Hour
Why Teacher’s Drink
Related Posts A Taste of Freedom Joe Biden The Magician Men Wearing Dresses Celebrate Mother’s Day Today Busy Night at Stone Henge as Workers Move all the Stones Forward One Hour
Father’s Day
This one really touched my heart. Remember Father’s Day is Sunday June 21st. “Dear God, this year please send clothes for all those poor ladies in my Daddy’s computer.” “Amen.” Related Posts Celebrating Fatherhood: Reflections on Father’s Day Celebrating Fatherhood: The Evolution and Significance of Father’s Day Celebrating the Unconditional Love and Sacrifices of Moms …
Significant Failures
Related Posts A Taste of Freedom Joe Biden The Magician Men Wearing Dresses Celebrate Mother’s Day Today Busy Night at Stone Henge as Workers Move all the Stones Forward One Hour
The “Middle Wife” by an Anonymous 2nd Grade Teacher
I’ve been teaching now for about fifteen years. I have two kids myself, but the best birth story I know is the one I saw in my own second grade classroom a few years back. When I was a kid, I loved show-and-tell. So I always have a few sessions with my students. It helps …
You named it what?
Related Posts A Taste of Freedom Joe Biden The Magician Men Wearing Dresses Celebrate Mother’s Day Today Busy Night at Stone Henge as Workers Move all the Stones Forward One Hour
Bull Rider
Related Posts A Taste of Freedom Joe Biden The Magician Men Wearing Dresses Celebrate Mother’s Day Today Busy Night at Stone Henge as Workers Move all the Stones Forward One Hour
How to Shower
How to shower like a woman: Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. Look at your womanly physique in the mi rror — make mental note to do …
Want to Curl Up and Die?
I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and asked loudly, “How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?” I turned around and walked back out and never. My husband didn’t say a word, he knew better. Melinda Lowe, 39, Seguin, TX Pad, please! An …